12 February 2020

The Klobot

Manchester, NH, 12 February 2020: Sen. Bernie Sanders of Vermont narrowly edged former South Bend, Indiana Mayor Pete Buttigieg to claim victory in New Hampshire's Democratic presidential primary. But the biggest winner in Tuesday's contest - the first primary in the White House race - may well be Sen. Amy Klobuchar of Minnesota, who came in a strong third. Klobuchar finished far ahead of Sen. Elizabeth Warren of Massachusetts and former Vice President Joe Biden, who are limping out of New Hampshire facing serious questions about the future of their campaigns.

Klobuchar - who hails from Iowa's neighbor to the north - finished a distant fifth in last week's Iowa caucuses. But a strong presidential primary debate performance on Friday seemingly pumped up her fortunes and gave her a big bounce - as she surged the final tracking polls over the weekend. The senator was obviously able to capitalize on her last-minute momentum. Exit polls suggest that older and more educated voters, as well as moderates and those looking for a candidate to unite the country, boosted Klobuchar's performance. 


Huh?  Who would actually take time out of their day, in which they probably got to go from one job to a second job, because they felt compelled to vote for this cold fish?

I mean, listen to this creaking harpy:
With her clunky, robotic delivery, she makes stuttering Joe Biden seem smooth. . .

Who voted for her?

With her dreadful oratorical skills, I can only imagine she might appeal to Jewish voters, since (in front of a microphone, at least) she surely ain't no Adolf Hitler, but anybody else?

Maybe it's her call to *the people in the middle?*  

But who are these people, these Median people?

The imaginary *middle American?* 

Exit polls says older people and *moderates* (what's a moderate?  See Revelation 3:14-16) like her.  That means scared sheeple.  They lived a lifetime brainwashed by the American Dream, and even though their standard of living has fallen significantly, they love so-called *centrists,* robot politicians who promise they can keep their shitty health insurance, can keep working their two shitty jobs and keep sending their kids to their shitty schools where they will read Thirteen Reasons Why instead of The Catcher In The Rye.

These *centrists* promise they won't do anything radical like *socialist* Bernie Sanders with his cRaZy health care plan (how can we pay for it?!?!) or racist Donald Trump with his caged kids immigration policy.

The sheeple just want to live their imaginary middle class lives, and fear any *extremist* who would wake them from their American Dream. . .

The sheeple just want to die peacefully in their sleep, preferably just before maxing out their credit cards. . .

It's a slow, steady decline, not too bumpy, and the sheeple are content as long as they can pay for their electronic gadgets.  Their real lives may be fraying at the edges, but all that can be simply cropped out on social media, where their illusions remain picture perfect.

Amy Klobuchar, the Klobot, with her robotic delivery of *sensible policies* is the perfect Median politician, promising to do nothing that would threaten the sheeple's imaginary middle class life. . .

Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump are political Stanleys, who frighten the Blanche DuBois middle class sheeple, while the Klobot is a political Mitch, who soothes and enables them in their self-delusion.  The surprise is not that the Klobot came from nowhere to get 20% of the vote, but that she didn't get more. 

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