A Penny For Your Thoughts

Besides my two sons, my only living blood relative is my first cousin Mike. I never particularly liked him. When we were kids, he stole a 1909-S VDB penny from me. He was always very materialistic. He always had more money than me. When I was an adult, I wouldn’t give him the time of day.

My ex-wife, my sons’ mother, was very big on family. She pushed and pushed for me to have our family meet Mike’s family. He was married to some broad and had four kids of his own. I finally relented. Over the course of three or four years we probably got together as families five or six times. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be.

Then Mike became a MAGA. That was fine with me, do whatever the fuck you want, but it wasn’t fine with him that I wasn’t a MAGA. The cocksucker proselytized me more than a Mormon or Jehovah’s Witness, but I would not relent.

I should also say that at this point in his life my cousin Mike thought he was quite a Christian and quite an expert on the Bible, but in reality he didn’t know shit about the gospel. He tried to tell me you couldn’t be a Christian if you didn’t support Trump. I tried to gently set him straight, but of course he didn’t hear a fucking thing I had to say. Then when Trump lost his election to Biden, I sent my cousin Mike an email in which I said ‘don’t worry, it don’t matter who the president is, your day-to-day life won’t change at all.’

He was furious. He said he could no longer have ‘fellowship’ with me.

I resisted the temptation to email him back and say ‘I never liked you, anyway, you fucking cocksucker.’

I bet that worthless cocksucker still has my 1909-S VDB somewhere.